Do You Even Know What You Want?

If you’re like most of the people we work with, you probably don’t have a well-defined five-year plan tucked away in your top drawer. With a bit of support and challenge however, we’re typically able to help our clients develop an aspirational vision for their future that is both bold and inspiring. For some, that vision comes to them as a crisp and clear window into a possible future, like gazing into a crystal ball. For others, it’s less tangible, like a felt sense or emotion. However it is manifested, having that vision offers them a north star to guide their short- and long-term decision making.

Having a vision is vital to building an intentional life, but is not sufficient alone to create it. Like a blueprint for the ideal home, until you take action to bring that vision to life, it is nothing more than a design unrealized. The hard work then, is what comes next.

The first challenge is often the resistance to taking that first step. Bold and inspiring visions don’t typically fit neatly into our existing lives. Things will need to change, and we will need to step out of our comfort zones in order for that change to happen. Since, by definition, what lies outside our comfort zone is some form is discomfort, it’s understandable that we may encounter resistance in ourselves. That first step takes courage and commitment.

Having the right support is therefore vital. Willpower alone is not enough, and we need to look to our accountability partners for help – the people that see us as the best versions of ourselves even when we can’t. Whether that’s a coach, a best friend or a partner, having social support is key. It’s also vital to recognize that some people, who we refer to as “accomplices,” are just as much or sometimes even more invested in your status quo then you are, so they might not be the ones to call on to support your vision.

While social support is a great enabler, rarely can your cheerleaders make real and lasting change on your behalf. So what remains is your own commitment, and how you’ll get in your own way. Here the real work is in understanding your mindset (do you really believe it’s possible? And do you believe you deserve it?*), your habits and behaviors, and your self-limiting beliefs.

[* It is. And, you do!]

We call the voice of your self-limiting beliefs ‘’saboteurs,” because they will try and sabotage your plans at every turn. Your saboteurs are the custodians of your comfort zone. They’re the voices inside your head that tell you why you can’t or shouldn’t do something. They always see the danger ahead, and they do their best to help you avoid it. Change, invariably, is the best way to trigger your saboteurs, but it’s also a great way to develop the skills and resources necessary to manage them. A great reframe here is to know that when you hear that voice in your head telling you why you shouldn’t be doing something, you know you’re making great progress.

If it sounds like bringing your vision to life is hard, that’s because it is . That’s why your vision needs to be bold, to be inspiring, to be a source of infinite energy to power you on your journey. Along the way you’ll encounter saboteurs and accomplices. But you’ll also find the people that believe in your vision too, and with their help, and by accessing the amazing resources you already have and discovering those you can’t yet access, you’ll be creating that future you imagined for yourself with each step you take.